Once upon a time there was a woman
who owned many cats, and told them all her problems.
She found it difficult to keep track of them
and it was not long before one went missing.
The next day she locked the doors and windows
and went to put up posters, leaving
the cats inside. She returned with a litter tray
and informed the animals that this was now
as close to outside as they were going to get.
She would never lose anyone else.
They mewed relentlessly at the back door
for the first years, but eventually gave up.
The woman had a wonderful time telling the cats
about her awful life but sometimes when she
breathed in to speak her mouth became clotted with hair.